Achieving Confidence and Nurturing Self-Care in Moms of Autistics
Manage episode 377353753 series 3407812
Hi Moms! In previous episodes, I’ve explored stressors for moms of autistics. One stressor that is pretty consistent across the board is the disapproving look or words from others.
This can happen with strangers, friends, or family. It can happen in public places, schools, or in private in one’s home.
One might say, “Who cares what others think?” Well, it’s not that easy. It’s one thing when someone disapproves of you in an individualized situation. It’s another when it involves the ones you love.
As moms, we are our child’s protector. The truth is that we cannot protect them from everything. Rather than escalating these situations resulting in lasting effects, how do you maneuver through these situations as your best self?
In this episode, I explore the weight of this stress on moms of autistics and how to move forward and rise above the disapproval of others and feel confident in your choices.
Find the full transcript for this episode at http://thrivingmomsofautistics.com/46
Please share the podcast with other moms to help them grow in their autism journey. You can also do this by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. I appreciate you!
An Autism Mom’s Human Response to Challenges and Disappointments
Raising an autistic is never boring. In fact, there are many blessings that come with being their mom.
I still find myself in disbelief that I get to be my son’s mom, especially after years of being childless and believing it would never happen.
There are ups and downs as with every parent-child relationship. We just have some unique challenges, which an confusion others.
Have you ever had a new experience that you didn’t quite understand? That is how it is for others, who do not have the experience of parenting an autistic child.
I’ve shared what it was like to be scrutinized by a young, childless couple at the zoo when my son was 3 and newly diagnosed. They were quite verbal about their disapproval of how we were keeping our son safe while giving him some autonomy using a safety backpack for children, who tend to wander or elope.
We found ourselves in another situation at a church when our son was starting to display more sensory seeking behaviors. Our son has always been busy. He can listen and take in everything around him but needs to move around at times.
It was Christmas time. Our son was 4 at the time and non-verbal. We took him to a celebration at church where an angel reads the Christmas story. While the children were sitting and listening intently, our son was standing by the wall, quietly playing with a piece of paper attached to the wall while he was listening to the story.
The angel reading the story seemed annoyed at times when he wasn’t sitting nicely like all the other children.
At one point, he decided to sit down with the other children and gently patted the little girl next to him on top of the head (duck duck goose style). Her dad grabbed his arm.
I raised my hand slightly to create a buffer and gently said, “It’s okay. He didn’t mean any harm.” He backed down, realizing that it wasn’t as it appeared.
My husband escorted our son from the room. I told the dad that my son was autistic and was trying to communicate with her. The angel stopped the story and stated with distain, “Oh, I thought so!”
You all have had similar stories. It doesn’t feel good, does it? It never does. But this, I know. It’s the human experience.
I have learned to stop and consider where the other individual is coming from. The angel clearly didn’t understand autism. The dad was just looking out for his daughter and had an automatic response. I get that.
Guess what? We’re going to have many more of these experiences. The good news is that people realize it is time to learn more abo
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