229. This Show Now Available On Cockroach DNA

Topic Lords

Lords:

• Megan
• Lexi

Topics:

• Erik Satie's performance indications
  • https://www.ilxor.com/ILX/ThreadSelectedControllerServlet?boardid=60&threadid=4497
• Instant food from other cultures (why isn't everyone eating maggi noodles??)
• Seasonal decorations
• Delhi Metro
  • https://docs.google.com/document/d/17k75ftxEn2xR-tJkLSV4H8st5BFAxPNxE3BNCXDI6Go/edit
• Becoming Immortal by being predictable
• Living in different climates (e.g. my experiences with the harsh winters of Chicago vs sweltering Austin TX summers)

Microtopics:

• Music implementation for The Lamplighters League.
• Watching a streamer play games and asking them for a turn at the controls.
• How to pronounce "Erik Satie."
• How to pronounce "Gymnopedies."
• Finding 100 umbrellas in your dead friend's apartment.
• A list of Satie's performance indications.
• Grandly forgetting the present.
• With your bones dry and distant.
• Playing music with your forehead.
• Doing something to a piano.
• Your boss sending a memo asking you to work with a shy piety.
• Pizzicato vs. Bartok pizzicato.
• Adding the hamburger so it's not just Helper.
• What instant foods are missing from your food vocabulary.
• Adding heavy cream to ramen broth.
• Getting an apron so you can have a little costume when you cook.
• Realizing that when you wear the apron you don't get food on your shirt.
• A big bib for Big Jim.
• Normalizing scoop bibs.
• Kraft Dinner.
• Halal certified instant stir fry noodles.
• Ramen in a cup or ramen where you provide your own container.
• Insurance Mac.
• Canned cheeseburgers.
• A boring house with nothing on it.
• Movable feasts.
• Keeping those 12-foot skeletons in your yard and decorating it seasonally.
• The beetles that clean bones for you.
• Recreational Explosives Day.
• A Zachtronics programming puzzle for every holiday.
• A movable feast where you don't eat.
• Decorating your house to celebrate Toyotathon.
• Falling for strangers and their blue hair.
• A poem that is long if you read it but short if you recite it.
• Taking public transit as an act of defiance.
• A gift that is impossible to give yourself on purpose.
• Inventing a shower proof phone so nobody ever has shower thoughts again.
• Putting your phone in a Ziploc bag and watching movies underwater.
• Sitting down at your computer and getting stuck.
• Hacking your executive function by adding friction in the right places.
• Whether Wellbutrin gives everyone tinnitus or just you.
• Death hacks for staying mentally connected to your dead relatives.
• A service that puts your podcast on vinyl.
• Using CRISPR to infect the cockroach population with 229 episodes of Topic Lords.
• Moving to a land where your snot doesn't freeze.
• Not trusting your own weather opinions.
• Surprising yourself by enjoying seasons.
• Driving in icy conditions.
• Standing under the heated lamps like a lizard.
• Waiting for the bus in the dark.
• Learning to drive after you move to a city with public transit.
• Not driving with kids.
• Getting rid of all the bots.
• Sgt. Pepper Bot.

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