How the NFL Works, S1 E2: Life After Football with Ryan Leaf

Go Long Podcast

The underbelly of this league is often gruesome.

Sadly, the NFL itself chooses to ignore that underbelly.

That’s why Ryan Leaf has become so valuable to droves of former players — he’s living proof. Many remember Leaf as the quarterback drafted No. 2 overall after Peyton Manning, the “bust” who threw 14 touchdowns, 36 interceptions and washed out of the sport. But everything that’s happened since he left the NFL is the real story. Leaf battled severe depression and eight years of opioid abuse. Breaking into the homes of friends to steal Oxycodone and Vicodin, his addiction was out of control.

Leaf attempted suicide, slicing his wrist with a dull life. He once considered letting his car run in his parents’ closed garage so they’d find him.

Leaf spent 32 months in prison.

Leaf completely turned his life.

The goal of our new show — “How the NFL Works” — is to bring you football in its most unfiltered form, so it only makes sense to bring on the man unafraid to reveal what life’s like for players after the whistle. Because Leaf also knows this: He’s not alone. He has become a go-to resource for players throughout the NFL. Original Go Long readers may remember the QB’s first visit with us, shortly after former NFL wideout Vincent Jackson tragically died. (It was very emotional.)

For an hour here, we take the conversation a step further.

Audio is above. Video is below.

Written transcript is available here.

A few topics discussed…

* How he has linked up with ex-players at the Menninger Clinic in Houston.

* Why he views the NFL as a “propaganda” and “money-printing” machine. Criticize the NFL and there’s a good chance you’re not welcomed onto the league’s morning show.

* Troy Vincent. He’s got a problem with the league’s executive vice president of football operations.

* Conversations with struggling ex-players. Many, like him, are having suicidal ideation. He takes listeners into this cruel world that’s not broadcast to the masses. His message to guys: “You could move mountains 100 times what you did as a football player.”

* The “identity crisis” players face once they enter the real world after a life in football.

* Leaf’s prison roommate convinced him to teach other inmates how to read. This gave Leaf a sense of purpose, even if he didn’t see it at the time. That sense of purpose changed everything in his life. Still, by no means does Leaf want people thinking a flip was switched and he’s in the clear. Staying sober for 12 years (and counting) is a daily struggle. He nearly relapsed right when he got out of prison, then again years later. Leaf relives both days in immense detail.

* Why he views himself as a “lighthouse.”

* Painkillers in football. They keep players on the field, but at what cost? It was a problem when Leaf played, and he’s heard it’s still a problem.

* Today? Leaf is happily married with two kids, calls college football games, does work with the Menninger Clinic and started a new venture with “The Last Mile,” in which the ex-QB helps current inmates learn a skill they can take into the workforce once they’re released. This work will also be featured on a new SiriusXM radio show.

* Leaf recently walked into the prison in which he was incarcerated. The anxiety was overwhelming. He saw the same guards who treated him poorly. Then, he remembered his larger purpose.

* What should the NFL do to help retirees?

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* Miss Episode 1 of “How the NFL Works?” Here’s my conversation with quarterback whisperer Quincy Avery.

Also, here is Leaf’s first chat with us, icymi:

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